A beautiful picture of some friends of mine, all in transition, with a timely reminder. I am, once again, at a stage of transition in my life. A transition can be defined as a "big life change," such as marriage, death of a loved one, moving, graduating, getting a new job, or culture reentry. The funny thing about transition is, we don't usually experience them one at a time. For instance, I graduated, and then about a month later, transitioned to a "new" job (substitute teaching). In a few weeks, I will be transitioning to yet another new job (a 3-month sub position) as well as moving to a new apartment a few blocks away. Not a giant change on either end, but still, a transition.
So, for those of you keeping score at home, that's about 4 different transitions in a 4-month period. I'm not great at transitions, so let's just say it's been a bit of a bumpy ride around here for a while. So, I dug out my LEAD team notes on Lexie's Transition talk and reminded myself of some truth: 1. Transitions put a "hole" in our emotional cups. There are a lot of feelings to work through. 2. Transition may not be as fun as it looks. We often have a lot of anxiety and it doesn't seem as "super fun" as it may on the outside. (This is actually a hugely glossed-over part of marriage! We don't realize how tough the transition can be going in and then it feels overwhelming & isolating.) 3. Transition makes you feel isolated. THIS IS HUGE! It gets harder to reach out and ask for help, but it is also more essential. Run to the Lord, do not pull away. Be honest with your friends. This has probably been the toughest part of transition for me, because I have had to move away from most of my friends. Oftentimes, when I don't hear from them in a long time, or we keep failing at seeing each other, it makes me feel unimportant & unloved. Which leads me to my next point: 4. Adult friendships are hard, especially at first. You really have to put yourself out there and be intentional about making plans. We have to chose to do friendship & it may feel unnattural, but taking the initiative is necessary if you are going to have any friends. 5. Admitting you need your friends more than they need you is okay. This one has been the most difficult for me to accept. With my friends in Eau Claire surrounded by community, they realistically don't need me as much as I need them. And that's okay. It doesn't diminish my worth or importance. It doesn't mean I'm a bad friend. It doesn't mean I did anything wrong. It is just the circumstance. I hope that if you are looking at a period of approaching transition, or you are in a time of transition right now, that you are able to take some of these words and allow them to sink into your soul.
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December 2022
I'm guessing I'll have it all figured out by the time I turn 30.
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